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Marriage Trauma Counseling - Make Your Relationship Active Once More

The large majority of individuals are of the view that having an intimate sexual affair actually counts as cheating, but what about sending a flirty text? What would you do if your partner secretly took out a number of loans and lined a large amount of debt without your knowledge? In this case, one is causing trauma in a relationship and they have to undergo marriage trauma counseling.

Author:Karan Emery
Reviewer:Katharine Tate
Oct 04, 202271 Shares1.5K Views
The large majority of individuals are of the view that having an intimate sexual affair actually counts as cheating, but what about sending a flirty text? What would you do if your partner secretly took out a number of loans and lined a large amount of debt without your knowledge?
In this case, one is causing trauma in a relationship and they have to undergo marriage trauma counseling. But before that, I still want to continue my question:
Does it count as a betrayal if you have virtual sex with someone other than your partner, connect with an ex on social media, or keep an online dating profile even though you are already in a committed relationship?
The answer is going to depend on how the individuals involved in the relationship understand the concept of marriage.

How Does It Feel To Have A Marriage Trauma?

Mental illness consumed my marriage -- until this epiphany

For married people who have been through trauma, it's hard to get in touch with their hurt and scared feelings. When they feel unsafe and weak, they may start to feel anxious.
They often don't ask for comfort or say what they need because, in the past, it might not have been safe to do so.
People may feel mild to moderate distress after something upsetting happens, and if they keep thinking about it, they may feel sad, anxious, or worried.

Trauma Block Connection In Relationships

Trauma can be like a third person in a relationship, with a complicated personality that controls how people act and how close they get to each other.
A couple with an issue does not face each other
A couple with an issue does not face each other
When trauma has a big effect on our body, mind, and emotions, it can be hard to stay open and vulnerable that it's hard to think about this effect, but it's also hard to explain.
Many people say they are afraid of being asked too many questions about the trauma or their feelings, which could make them feel too much.
When I am reminded of the trauma, I shut down. My partner usually thinks she has done something to anger me, but really, I am trying to stay in control of how I feel on the inside.- A random person who has experienced marriage trauma

The Counseling Process - How Do They View Your Situation?

Gabrielle Usatynski, an LPC and founder of Power Couples Counselingin Boulder and Louisville, Colorado, says that clients who have been cheated on by a partner sometimes meet the criteria for posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
In fact, some therapists have started using the term "post-infidelity stress disorder" to describe this similarity. This is because the emotional response to infidelities, such as ruminating thoughts, sleep problems, erratic behaviors and moods, health problems, and depression, can be similar to the emotional response to other traumatic events.
A therapist taking notes during a conversation with a stressed man
A therapist taking notes during a conversation with a stressed man
SART describes seven milestones clients go through as they heal from infidelity:
  • Setting the stage for healing
  • Getting the story
  • Acknowledging the impact
  • Choosing a path
  • Creating a plan of action
  • Implementation and healing pains
  • Sustainability

Tips You'll Get From The Counselors

Secrets of a Couples Counselor: 3 Steps to Happier Relationships | Susan L. Adler | TEDxOakParkWomen

Jennifer Meyer, an LPC in private practice in Fort Collins, Colorado, has found that having couples write down their feelings and emotions, which can be very strong, helps them get over an affair.
From the start, she has couples share a journal and write to each other about how they feel. After the couple has had time to figure out what caused the cheating and deal with it, Meyer asks the person who cheated to write an apology letter and read it to the person who was hurt.
In this letter, the person who hurt someone says they are sorry for what they did and understand the pain they have caused.
Additionally, one of the most important parts of recovering from trauma is learning how to be open and trusting, both in ourselves and in others. This is a slow process. Sometimes, a therapist may be needed to learn how to do this.

When Should You Seek Professional Help?

If you or someone you know has been experiencing symptoms for more than four weeks, it is recommended that you seek the help and support of a professional.

People Also Ask

What Percentage Of Marriages Survive After Counseling?

The American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists (AAMFT), reports an overall success rate of 98%.

Do Marriage Counselors Ever Recommend Divorce?

Even if one partner is abusive, a couple's therapist probably won't suggest that they break up. But they will help the victim get away and look for help. Therapists will do whatever it takes to make sure their clients are safe.

What Are The Signs Your Marriage Is Over?

7 Signs Your Marriage Is Over According to Experts
  • Lack of Sexual Intimacy.
  • Frequently feeling angry with your spouse.
  • Dreading spending alone-time together.
  • Lack of respect.
  • Lack of trust.
  • Disliking your spouse.
  • Visions of the future do not include your spouse.

Final Words And Recommendations For Happy Marriage

Even if one partner is abusive, a couple's therapist probably won't suggest that they break up. But counselors and therapists will help the victim get away and look for help. Therapists will do whatever it takes to make sure their clients are safe.
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Karan Emery

Karan Emery

Author
Katharine Tate

Katharine Tate

Reviewer
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