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McCain, Not Exactly the Come Back Kid

Jul 31, 2020247 Shares246.6K Views
"It seems like Barack Obama’s running for Jimmy Carter’s second [term]?" That’s the best that Sen. John McCain could come up with when confronted with Obama’s constant attack saying that to elect John McCain would, in effect, re-elect George W. Bush for a third term? Dude, seriously. Now we understand snappy comebacks are hard, but McCain’s heard this so many times he must have had time to prep. And while we really don’t have a dog in this race, we thought we’d offer up a few responses for the next time McCain’s Democratic rival tries to link him with possibly the most unpopular political figure of our time. After meeting with our own team of consultants which included my "tween" nieces Maya and Samsara, the creative team behind the epic television series "Benson" and a 6-foot rabbit named Harvey who shows up at our house after not taking our behavioral meds, here’s what we came up with:
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*Instead of tying me to Bush all the time, how about finding a new church, dude?Man, Senator you can really get him on that one. You could even argue that Sen. Obama will be so distracted by finding a new place for Sunday worship –this isn’t something you just find in the yellow pages– that he will forget his responsibilities as commander-in-chief, gas prices will reach $10.00 a gallon and millions of people will be forced to set up shanty towns across the country, hoping that a mystical horse named Seabiscuit will buoy our fortunes and rise up our spirit from the ashes.
  • Oh yeah, well I went to war! *This one stings. It’s a comment that strikes at the heart of the central argument for the McCain presidency during this election — that of a man with honorable military experience who knows the brutality and loss and suffering and costs of combat in the field verses a relative neophyte who still gets lost walking around the Senate (if you believe McCain).
  • And what’s wrong with that? *With this simple statement, McCain could shore up those members of the evangelical movement who’ve cooled to him so far, but mobilized with great enthusiasm for Bush. It would also solidify his cred with the anti-tax crowd and the neo-conservatives who favored going to war and are still in favor of keeping a significant military presence in the region. It’s all about the base baby!
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Hajra Shannon

Hajra Shannon

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