George Will Really Is Losing It

George Will, dressed to impress (Flickr: Scott Ableman)

There has been a lot of speculation lately about how The Washington Post, as one of the world’s preeminent news organizations, could actually allow columnist George Will’s recent factually challenged and much-maligned climate change denialist rant to be published. Many suspect it is due to the cheerleading of The Post’s powerful editorial page editor, Fred Hiatt.

Today, the dangerous insufficiency of The Washington Post’s op/ed page editing process became even more painfully obvious. Will, through his decades of writing, has become a one-man institution at The Post. With Hiatt’s perma-green light, no matter how crazy, poorly reasoned, just plain dumb, or embarrassing Will’s columns might be, there doesn’t seem to be anyone there who will say no — effectively giving Will carte blanche to publish whatever drivel his brain produces.

How else can one possibly explain the fact that Will’s latest column — a 750-word screed against that bane of all things American, blue jeans (!) — actually made it into print?

Denim is the infantile uniform of a nation in which entertainment frequently features childlike adults (“Seinfeld,” “Two and a Half Men”) and cartoons for adults (“King of the Hill”). Seventy-five percent of American “gamers” — people who play video games — are older than 18 and nevertheless are allowed to vote. In their undifferentiated dress, children and their childish parents become undifferentiated audiences for juvenilized movies (the six — so far — “Batman” adventures and “Indiana Jones and the Credit-Default Swaps,” coming soon to a cineplex near you). Denim is the clerical vestment for the priesthood of all believers in democracy’s catechism of leveling — thou shalt not dress better than society’s most slovenly. To do so would be to commit the sin of lookism — of believing that appearance matters. That heresy leads to denying the universal appropriateness of everything, and then to the elitist assertion that there is good and bad taste.

Oh, I’m sorry. Was that not quite pretentiously asinine enough for your taste? Well, then, try this on for size:

This is not complicated. For men, sartorial good taste can be reduced to one rule: If Fred Astaire would not have worn it, don’t wear it. For women, substitute Grace Kelly.

Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers (Source: RKO Pictures)

Yes, that’s right. To wear anything less than coattails or a ball gown (with heels!) at all times is to prove yourself an indigent slob whose fashion sense offends Will’s delicate sensibilities.

See, here’s the thing. Blue jeans are comfortable. And affordable. And they look reasonably OK on pretty much anyone, and they go well with almost any shirt. That’s why people wear them. Also, they rank right up there with apple pie, Chevrolet and rock n’ roll as quintessential American icons. Is Will saying he’s too good for America?

For years, I really did enjoy reading Will, whom I, like many on the left, often found to be a smart, reasonable, entertaining, and increasingly rare voice of old-school classical conservatism. I’m not sure what happened to that guy, but maybe it’s about time for Will to start thinking about packing it in. He’s had a good run, and it’s probably better to go out with a shred of dignity than as a has-been laughingstock.

And if I, in the autumn of my career, ever start publishing pointless and nonsensical ravings such as Will’s anti-blue jeans diatribe, I do hope someone will Google this post and send it to me, and I will take that as my signal that it’s about time to hang it up.